Roleplaying 101 for Men

A couple's arms and hands in bed, the woman is cuffed.

Some people think of sexual roleplay as “putting on a costume for sexy reasons.” This is a very basic understanding of the concept since there’s much more to it than that. It’s not just about putting on a costume or portraying a character that leads to sexy time.

In this article, we’re breaking down misconceptions about roleplaying! Let’s have a look at what it actually is, why it’s important, and how we guys can do it.

What is Sexual Roleplaying?

Before we get to roleplaying in the bedroom, let’s first clarify what roleplaying is. The term “roleplaying” itself refers to the process of thinking or behaving as someone who has a particular role. It’s the act of pretending to be someone you’re not. Regardless of whether it’s for silly fun or entertainment, it’s roleplaying. By understanding that, “sexual roleplaying” should already become a self-explanatory term.

Sexual roleplaying is the act of roleplaying with the intention of getting intimate with someone.

Why should we do it?

The simple answer is: because it’s fun! But there’s a deeper and more important aspect besides the fact that it can be a thrilling experience for you and your partner.

Playing out a fantasy through roleplaying has a psychological and emotional impact on the people who practice or experience it.

How can we #DoItRight?

First, it’s vital that you and your partner communicate. You need to discover fantasies that you have in common or fantasies that you’re both comfortable with. 

Next, you have to prepare. Of course, roleplaying involves dressing up or portraying a certain character. You need to have the necessary costume, equipment, and headspace to roleplay properly. When you have everything you’ll need, it’s time to finally get kinky!

Even if it isn’t your first time, though, you might want to go slow. Some people may take their time adjusting to the characters they’re playing or interacting with.

It’s also important to set boundaries. At the end of the day, you two are seeking to please each other, so it’s best to avoid making each other uncomfortable. Establish safe words if you have to, and be sensitive to how your partner feels during sexual roleplay.

Lastly, you just have to enjoy it. The essence of sexual roleplay is to get intimate in a new or uncommon way that’s supposed to be exciting for you and your partner.

Roleplaying in the bedroom shouldn’t be an embarrassing thing. There’s nothing wrong with indulging in fantasies and fetishes, so long as we act with respect for our partner/s and refrain from harming anyone. In other words, we have to remember to #DoItRight! 


  • 10 surprising (and real) benefits to exploring role playing in the bedroom. FindATopDoc. (n.d.). https://bit.ly/3WjvMsv
  • Zane, Z. (2021, December 23). How to role-play in bed and not be embarrassed. Men’s Health. https://bit.ly/3q0KeL4
  • Image from Freepik
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