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Girl’s Guide To Getting The Big O

Orgasm

Who wouldn’t want a taste of the big O!? It’s the most anticipated part of sex for most people!

It’s always believed that most women can’t orgasm, and that penetration is the only way to make a woman orgasm — but they’re not true! A lot of women don’t reach orgasm because most of the time, their male partners don’t know what can make the woman orgasm; but the bigger issue behind this is that the female orgasm isn’t openly discussed as much as the male orgasm that’s why it’s such a “mysterious” topic.

Contrary to popular belief, vaginal penetration isn’t the only way to make women orgasm. This is only one possible way to reach orgasm, but most women need clitoral stimulation to reach climax. In fact, there are a lot of ways to make women orgasm and most women can experience them even without a partner!

On top of that, women also face a lot of expectations from society that hinders them from achieving orgasm. Women are conditioned to stray away from talking about sexual topics and pleasure, and to prioritize their male partners’ pleasure before their own. A lot of women also have insecurities about their body image, which may hold them back from enjoying sexual activities.

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with exploring your sexuality. It’s your body and you get to decide what you want to do!

If you’ve never had an orgasm, then this might be your chance to experience your first one! You’re never too old or too young to have your first orgasm. Having a partner also isn’t a requirement to experience it. For those who tried but failed, we’re here to help take you to the peak. Here’s what you can do to explore your orgasmic potential:

Touch your body!

Don’t be a stranger to your own body, ladies! Lock your doors and take the opportunity to get acquainted with your body. Before proceeding to your genitals, exploring your whole body can already turn you and put you in the moment.

Let your hands explore your body. Touch different parts besides your genitals, and try out different pressures. Your body is filled with erogenous parts, so try touching each of them to find out what turns you on. Every body is unique and will need different things to turn them on and reach orgasm. Some may prefer light touches while others may like heavier pressure.

Let your imagination run wild!

Believe it or not, but the brain is the most erogenous zone. Sexual activities involve both the body and brain. Let your mind wander and imagine your sexiest fantasies. Some feel guilty when they get turned on by fantasizing certain scenarios or people, but you don’t really have to do in real life whatever you fantasize about.

Does the idea of doing it on the couch turn you on? Do you fantasize about having sex in the kitchen? Do you want to have sex in the car with the person you like?

If you don’t have any idea what fantasies turn you on, you can explore erotic stories or literature, erotic art or images, porn, or sex scenes from movies and books. Those who had sexual experiences in the past can also think back to those moments that they find arousing.

Masturbate

Most people get their first orgasm through masturbation. Before you can tell your partner what you like and what works for you, it will help if you teach yourself how to orgasm first. There’s nothing wrong with masturbating — it’s a healthy and safe way to discover yourself and your sexuality!

If you have a pocket mirror or any mirror that’s easy to hold, it will help you take a closer look at your genitals and get to know its parts. Most women experience orgasm through clitoral stimulation. For starters, experiment with different touches and pressures on your clitoris. You can flick it, rub it, press it, or squeeze it. Find out what kind of touches and how light or heavy turns you on. Most women reach orgasm in no time when they start playing around with their clitoris — and perhaps you’re one of these women!

Play around with toys

Thanks to technology, there are now toys that can help you achieve orgasm. There are a lot of different toys for different needs, but some sex toys you can start with are dildos and vibrators. You can use sex toys on your own or with your partner (which makes them great investments!).

If you don’t have access to sex toys or you’re not yet sure whether you should get one, you can use some items you find lying around your house. Some women use an electric toothbrush to stimulate their clitoris, while others use the water flowing from the showerhead or bidet. The handle of a hairbrush can also be used for vaginal penetration. Just make sure it doesn’t have rough and sharp edges, and that you clean it thoroughly before and after use.

Be patient

While learning to orgasm can be possible and achievable, some may not learn it right away. Take it easy because there’s no need to rush things. You don’t have to worry about how long it takes for you to orgasm. It doesn’t matter if it takes you a minute or an hour, what matters is that your body is enjoying and getting what it wants. Rushing things won’t make things better!

If you feel like you’re not making progress, just keep going and give your body time to get aroused. Experiment with touches and positions until you find what your body likes.

Enjoy the moment

If you spend your masturbation sessions thinking that you MUST orgasm soon, the more it won’t happen. Pressuring yourself to achieve orgasm will only make you frustrated. The stress and pressure won’t make you feel relaxed and present at the moment, and will make you focus more on your worries than on the sensations your body feels.

It’s okay if you don’t orgasm on your first try. It doesn’t mean you’ll never achieve it. If you’ve experienced orgasm — congratulations! But remember that orgasm is not the sole goal or focus of sex.

There’s a lot to enjoy during sex than just orgasm — the sensations, pleasure, and connection with your partner. Orgasm also isn’t the only purpose of masturbation. It’s also a time to relax, get to know your body, and please yourself.

Sex and masturbation aren’t games where you need to win a prize (which is usually orgasm); rather, they’re experiences that are meant to enjoy whether or not you achieve orgasm. No doubt that having an orgasm is fun and amazing, but that’s just a few seconds of the entire experience. What matters is that you have fun from start to finish!

Sources:

https://www.scarleteen.com/article/bodies_sexuality/how_to_have_your_first_orgasm_a_primer_for_cisgender_women

https://www.healthline.com/health/healthy-sex/female-orgasm

https://www.healthline.com/health/healthy-sex/types-of-orgasms

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