When did being single become some sort of curse that everyone thinks you’ll never be happy when you’re single??? It doesn’t lessen your worth, and most certainly it doesn’t mean that you can’t achieve happiness and success.
With all the jokes and memes — especially the “sana all” movement — that poke fun at the singles, it’s easy to be convinced that singlehood is such a sad, lonely state of life. Filipino culture has always thought of the singles as unhappy, so much so that they start to dread family reunions because of the questions “may jowa ka na ba (do you have a lover already)”, and “kailan ka mag-aasawa (when are you getting married)” are always being asked.
If you’re single and not happy, it’s totally okay and understandable! Happiness isn’t impossible to achieve while being single, and you can always do something to turn things around. Maybe you’re not happy YET, but we believe you will be soon!
Enjoy the freedom
Being single means having more room to enjoy your freedom. No need to compromise and negotiate, or consult a partner about what you want to do.
What would you do with your autonomy? Book a spontaneous trip, buy what you want, color your hair outrageous hues — it’s your call! Do what will make you happy, and take the opportunity to define yourself and your life.
Don’t chase anyone
Focus on yourself and not on anyone else. If someone makes you chase them, chances are they aren’t really interested in you, and they could be just getting satisfaction from the attention and feeling that someone is chasing them. If there’s anything you should chase, it should be your happiness.
You don’t need anyone else’s attention to be happy, or even lowering your standards for the sake of attracting someone to date you. It’s okay to raise your standards — after all, you only deserve the best.
Learn about yourself
A lot of people often rather be with other people because being with others is like a form of escape from themselves. Sometimes, people seek distraction so that they avoid focusing on themselves and facing the things they don’t like about themselves.
When you’re single, it’s a great opportunity to take advantage of the time and energy you have to be more in touch with yourself and discover more about who you are.
You can practice mindfulness, do some meditation, or try a new hobby that challenges you. Rediscover yourself and work on personal growth.
Try something new
Being single gives you the chance to try new things that you might not be able to do if you have a partner. Maybe you’re interested in a certain activity that you want to try, and now you don’t have to worry about getting anyone’s permission or approval.
Foster other relationships
Being single doesn’t mean that you don’t have a relationship — they’re everywhere with anyone! It’s a great time to foster other relationships that you have. You can bond with your friends, or spend more time with your family.
Aside from your friends and family, you can also foster your relationship with your community. This is your chance to give back to others by volunteering in local charities or non-government organizations (NGOs). Helping others may help boost self-esteem and feelings of gratitude; and as a bonus, connect with people you may not usually encounter. You get to interact with people from different backgrounds, and maybe even make new friends.
Appreciate what you have
It’s normal to envy people who are in a relationship, but focusing on what you don’t have and on the negativity of being single will only make you feel bad. Feeling bad about yourself will take its toll on your mood, and people may pick up on your negativity. Look at the things and people you have around you. Be thankful for anything and everything that puts a smile on your face. Being grateful fosters positivity and good energy.